Dreams - the trauma and drama

I'm sure everyone of us have dreamt of something horrendous at some point or the other, some strange person chasing behind to kill you for a reason unknown or an ugly monster trying to strangle you to death.. or maybe you falling off a cliff into abysmal space... but trust me none of it comes close to the recent dreams that is tormenting me.. nothing comes close.. except may be one time when i dreamt of a person who was very close trying to suffocate me :P

A few days back, i got a call from my manager in the morning, she complained that i missed picking up an important customer call who was trying to reach for assistance on the support phone. Its a 24*7 assistance phone and every person in the team has to hold the phone for a week. So, I hurried to reach for the support phone to see if there were any calls and i see 50 missed calls! Damn, how can i be so irresponsible. Manager is on the line and i have nothing to tell her.. guilt and anxiety overpowers me and i'm lost for words. In that trauma, i open my eyes wide to see a dark room around! good gracious, i was only dreaming and worst still, that day i dint even have the support phone with me :-\  ofcourse, I double checked before i went back to sleep again :)

Just yesterday i got another call from my manager with the same complaint while i was driving. Frustrated about my negligence, with lot of guilt i apologized and told her that i would call back the customer and work on the issue. Just when i cut the call, i realized (bloody hell!) i dont have the support phone with me! Cursing for the mixup, i called her back and asked her who told i was on callout, because i was not! She thought for a while and before she could respond back.. some strange horrible sound rang right next to my ear! yep, my alarm..

Two incidents within a span of 2 weeks on the same subject.. i hope these dreams are not hinting something bad. Any dream analyzers out there??

Abhinaya in dance - a lost cause?

Recently, in one of the abhinaya class, we were all trying to be yashoda who wants to see her son's beautiful face(krishna) and so is trying to lure him to come to her (krishna nee begane baro).. and trust me, its not an easy job. While we were struggling, one of the student, who obviously was also finding it difficult to do, raised an interesting question in class - why do we have to do abhinaya? who in today's world will call her son like this? It looks so fake...

Fake is a very strong word in my opinion but lets stick to that word for now. Yes, if you switch off your imagination for a moment, it is fake because in reality you are no yashoda, and krishna is nowhere to be seen.

Now, lets take an example of a recent movie, Haider. I'm choosing a movie because that is most accepted in today's world. So, in the movie, the hero realizes that his uncle got his father killed and his mother is now married to him. Guess what happens in the immediate next scene..  you see shahid kapoor dancing with a bunch of other dancers in perfect synch trying to express his anger -

In the name of god, which human being would do that in reality? I mean when you realize that your father was killed by your uncle, would you gang up with a group of dancers, choreograph a dance(or maybe first learn dance), work on the synchronization, work on the lyrics, music and then perform in front of people? why do we not call it fake then? Infact when i watched that movie, the song seemed so apt for the situation, why? why such an unrealistic action seems so perfect?

Because, the song invokes necessary emotion, although the expression is through dance, the anger is brought out elegantly and ofcourse shahid has done a great job. In the same way, whether its yashoda or any other mother, love towards her child is same, may be the story is old, may be the way of expression is different. But isn't that what makes the dance beautiful, the imagination of how yashoda would call her son. How would she lure him to come near her so that she could see his beautiful face and hug him.

I distinctly remember a performance by Dr. Padma Subramanyam in one of the dance festivals. Shiva in disguise as a mendicant comes to his devotee's house to test him and asks for his son's brain curry. It was a solo performance and she brought out the emotions of the three characters, (father, mother and son) so beautifully that one could easily make out which role was she playing at any point. When the father finally cut his own son's head, i was literally in tears and not just me, I could see so many people in tears(for those who debates that i cry for almost everything), such was the influence of her abhinaya.

Now considering that in reality, no father would be so idiotic that he would kill his own son just because some beggar asked for his brain soup, how could it move so many people?

Abhinaya, in its enormity, has the capability of transforming the audience to a surreal world and if the dancer could connect to them and ignite the emotion with her story telling, the story becomes real. However, the challenge is how well you connect with the audience with your story telling and ofcourse how much are you convinced with your story.

In an attempt to prove that the story is old, irrelevant and stupid in today's world should we lose out on the imagination it kindles in people's mind? Or should we retain the emotion it brings out and put our creative mind to work to see how we can change the expression to make it accessible in today's world?

Majestic Himalayas

Recently, I had been to Leh, Ladadh and the journey was just.. overwhelming. 14 days of isolation from the traffic and the buzzing noises of the cities - the trip was almost like a dream come true.

I had always wondered why many people who had been to himalayas crave indefinitely to return to those mountain ranges. Its the same mountains.. and all the days u are there, it would still be the same mountains... Yes, you definitely can enjoy and experience the boundless beauty, once in a lifetime experience, yes! but going back risking your life again?...

...never could comprehend that unrelenting force all this while. Now, after seeing those majestic mountains, i am desperate to go back again, to those boundless ranges.

It literally calls for you, lure you.. to that enigmatic world. Your eyes never satisfied of bathing in that eternal beauty thrives for more. There is warmth in that numbing cold**, music in the wind and rocks with the streams and rivers dancing along...

...And then, there is stillness in mind. I just stared in awe at those huge, magnanimous structures, the first time i saw them so close a range. The charisma left me spellbound.

Its a different feeling to experience them at such close proximity. It stands tall yet humble, embraces you lovingly with its enchanting beauty and yet, can be equally, incredibly intimidating. The self boasted arguments, ego, accolades and achievements are grounded and burnt to ashes in front of those majestic himalayas and you submit yourself whole heartily and bow down to live at the mercy of nature.

People have different expectations of these mountains, some explore them for the experience and to enjoy the mesmerizing beauty while others trying to fulfill their dreams, to test their limits. Whatever may be the reason, i'm sure you will be taken for a ride... each time!

** I definitely don't intend to mean you don't need warm clothing there ;) just to be clear

Par bandhe acche hai :)

It was almost around 10 when i started from my office today. On my way back, i had stopped in one of the signal. Though the signal was clearly showing us to stop, someone from behind was blinking continuously. His eyes were not coordinated with each other, but I'm pretty sure he observed that the signal is RED. I signalled him showing the signal hoping that he would understand that it is still RED and i dont have an option to move until it is green.

Well, not to mention, my efforts of educating him went in drain! He just wouldn't stop.

The story dint end there! Once the signal turned green, he started following me.. creating nuisance and blocking my way. Though I was able to steer through the gap and move ahead,  undeterred, he continued his act. Well, you cannot beat a two-wheeler in traffic.

Agitated by the nuisance put up for the mistake of mine unknown, I almost had the thoughts of hitting his bike so hard that he would dare not repeat this nonsense again. (Spare the practicality of whether i would really do it or not :P )

Before the situation worsened, a motorcycle stopped in between blocking the rider. He allowed me to pass and took care of the situation immediately. I thanked him and drove ahead. But the moment was just 'WOW'. I had read articles about taking a stand to protect women against harassment, have seen advertisements about protecting women. But experiencing it is such a amazing feeling. Though it was a small gesture, it was more than enough to make me feel secured.

Seeing a person, a stranger, taking that one step to protect a person in need is phenomenal. This blog entry is dedicated to all of those who would take that one step towards protecting women against all this nuisance... Thank You :)

First day @ Swimming - Blurry vision

It was my first day of swimming, the instructor had clearly told me that im supposed to open my eyes under water so i royally opened my eyes all the while floating even though I felt the sting of water. Least that i knew the after-effects of that daring act of mine!

After an hour of floating, the environment around me seemed very dull and cloudy.. I wasn't worried much since i knew that chlorine has some effects on eyes. But later in the changing room, the tube-light had a super glowing effect which irritated my eyes, being skeptical about it, I rinsed my eyes.. and then the stage was set.. drama began..

Everything around me started glowing, I felt i was dipped in a pool of holy water and was blessed with spiritual energy to see the aureole of various things around me.. so bright.. blue.. red.. green auras.. it glared my vision, I was stupendously amazed by the virtue of spirituality. I came out of the room and i could hardly see the objects 10 feet away.. my eyes were all red with irritation. I thought this spiritual effect might stay longer than expected and was desperately praying God to return back my normal vision.

Hoping that God still had some mercy on me, i reached office with great difficulty, my eyes were nearly blinded by the powerful rays of Lord Surya whenever it hit the windshield. But the greater pain was driving in the night.. yes! needless to say, the spiritual effect did stay until night. I was completely blinded by the high-beam lights, could not judge where the divider was and neither could i see anyone crossing the road. In the meanwhile, i sought my all-time adviser, on the cause and remedial measure for eye irritation and it did return a long list of search results. I was all set to try some home remedies.

One of them seemed very simple and less painful.. (there were suggestions of keeping onions on eyes so that tears would wash off the excessive chlorine!! i would never do that). Back home, i took a cup of milk and tried to pour on my eyes. Undoubtedly, it never reached my eyes in the first attempt! Hell-bent, i continued my task.. after a lot of futile efforts and straining my neck, i was successful in pouring some milk into my eyes and that indeed did wonders.. my first tear of joy rolled down my cheeks.. never was i so happy when i cried!!

For all those frustrated swimmers who just need the SOLUTION at the moment than all the crap i wrote -

Pour few drops of pasteurized milk into eyes.. try for sometime and that clears the vision. A power nap would add to the effect and relax ur eyes. If you are worried more about the logic, there is a site called GOOGLE.. which has all the answers to your inquisitive brain :P

Next time, don't forget your swim goggles :)

Happy swimming

Go Goa!

Five girls, All first-timers to Goa, planned for a trip when we knew that wedding bells for pari is near. We had shortlisted 3 places out of which Goa was the feasible option ;) After lots of mail chains with 'No', 'May be', 'Not this time', 'busy', we could finally make it happen and this one effortlessly wins a place in the "Best trips of my life".

On September 29th, amidst busy schedules and high priority tasks, we were busy packing for the 6:30 bus. It dint matter what we packed/left all we were thinking was goa! beaches, sand, endless water, water sports and ofcourse, shopping :P . Though the bus we booked was AC sleeper, it turned out to be in my favor, it had windows! At first, it dint look like an AC sleeper at all, well, even after many glances it wasn't even close, The driver had to confirm us that it is an AC bus! Though the bus wasn't that great, the journey was wonderful, then i realized, its not the bus that matters but the journey! (Ring any bells guys?? hehehe ;) )

We had booked five upper berth seats, but most of the time, we were all in the first 3 seats, chit-chatting.. planning.. gossiping. And the conductor was worried that the upper berth may not take the weight! (I was happy that at least someone thinks that way :P ) poor chap, he definitely had a tough time directing us to occupy the rest of them!

Goa is much more admirable than i thought - look alike buildings, well maintained roads, boundless blue sea... sunset.. busy shopping streets..  it was captivating and simply amazing! We stayed at Raman resort, Calangute. Its a beach resort and is filled with white sand. The ambiance looked so apt for a beach resort. The rooms were well maintained. I especially loved the restaurant there, it had a sit-out facing the beach and you could listen to the roars of the waves to your hearts content. Its quite calm and private there. We sat late in the night, it was so peaceful and relaxing with just the roars of the sea and nothing else! (All thanks to Ashwini :) ).

We hired two-wheeler to roam around the city. It was fun riding in goa, the roads were empty and are well maintained. A person who rides in bangalore traffic would definitely enjoy the best, riding in goa! Without knowing the city at all, we could reach our destination, hassle free. I don't recall any incidents of loosing the track or wondering where we are, apart from rounding every circle we came across, twice!! ;) For me, every road looked the same! But guess The Google Maps and our navigator were best at work :)

I can go on and on about Goa and the things we did, but here are the must-do things, which i think should not be missed if you are in Goa -

1. Chapora Fort - Early morning is the best time - you could see the sunrise and enjoy the view of Vegator beach.
2. Hire a bike and roam around the city.. oops, sorry.. state!!
3. Water sports - Enjoy the ride on waves and the feel of adrenaline rush when you race against the waves. Banana ride is just too awesome, its a must try. I dint like para-sailing much, since it was for just 10 mins. but yes, it is worth a try.. but im sure most of them are disappointed when they pull back the rope.
4. Evening walk from calangute to baga beach.. I missed this one though. By evening, water sports recedes so you dont find much people around. A walk in the beach at sunset is mesmerizing.
5. Alcove resort (for food) - Food is just amazing here, If you are a pure vegetarian then this place is like an oasis in the desert ;) Ofcourse, those who want to try sea food, you have varieties.
6. Shopping :-P - If you are a shopaholic and know bargaining, you could shop to your hearts content :)

This post was long time due. Its been almost 2 n half months now, but still the memories are so vivid and crystal clear and im happy to be a part of it :)

Confused and lost

Me: "Excuse me, how do i reach Majestic from here?"
Stranger: "Take a right in the second signal, first left, third right,......diagonal left......... straight......... signal........"
Me (profoundly confused): oh ok! Thanks.

Some instructions faded instantaneously and a few more mocked at me, needless to say, i was lost again. To remember the directions, be it a simple(what others like to call it as) left and right is such a painful, arduous and exhaustive task. There are cases of me steering the car right while the rest of them are shouting "left left left!..." The biggest ordeal is when i reach some place with great difficulty and while leaving they ruthlessly say "Take the same route, it will take you to your place". I will be confounded with the very idea of it!

Leave alone that! The greatest tragedy of my life is when im the sole person traveling in an auto and compelled to give instructions to the reckless auto-walas. Hopelessness adorns their face while im desperately deciding on left or right. Many-a-times, they give me a deadly look when i say "take right" and in reality there is a huge building standing straight in the way!. Someone told me that girls usually have left/right confusions... hmm... some relief!

However, its not just the left/right im confused about... It took me few months to get accustomed to the campus roads in college while my friends took few minutes to digest the whole map. Every time i took a turn, i was mystified and stupefied to discover that the road actually connected to canteen.. or administrative block or library! Sometimes, i get this feeling of deja-vu when i see some roads.. I see familiar buildings, trees.. and then comes the realization that i have been there almost every day but from the other side of the road!

How unmindful and stupid of me, i think sometimes! Why don't i remember the directions when everyone else around me knows it by-heart. "You need to concentrate while driving" is the most popular advice i always get from people. But, No matter how hard i concentrate, i can hardly remember few turns.. many more? im lost for sure. Its like asking a color-blind person to concentrate more on colors!

Every-time i take a bus, i make it a point to remember the directions.. well-equipped with a beamy idea of mobile-holding-hand as right and the other one left, I memorize every turn it takes, find a landmark for every turn.. and this goes on effortlessly for the first few turns.. few more diversions, i start to wonder where the bus took the first left! It hardly takes few minutes to contemplate that i lost the track yet another time!

Well, I have to admit, It was never easy for me to take complaints about my short term memory for directions. Sometimes, I yell at them... stop talking... remain stone-cold.. try hard to concentrate where i am! But, Nevertheless, i still have to ask them which way to go! I see no end to this drama......

P.S : I was googling for directions confusion and i hit this interesting blog, nicely written. Im very much convinced that im not the only ONE ;) One suggestion was to note down the directions. Guess i will start that one :)